Task
Some people dislike changes in their society and in their own lives, and want things to stay the same.
Why do some people want things to stay the same?
Why should change be regarded as something positive?
Examiner’s Answer
This model has been prepared by an examiner as an example of a very good answer.
It is true that nothing in life is permanent except change. Changes in society and our own lives are inevitable. We all get older, friends and family move away, and our employment situation can suddenly change. Understandably, many people wish everything could stay the same. In this essay, I would like to consider the reasons for this view and explain why it is better to embrace change.
Wanting to feel in control of our lives is perfectly normal. We often feel vulnerable when events in society occur which are beyond our control or when we cannot be sure of the outcome of something. The uncertainty caused by the COVID-19 pandemic is an example of this. Changes in our personal circumstances can also be hard to accept. For example, when a friend or family member moves away, we may experience a deep sense of loss. Ironically, even good changes can bring uncertainty. If we receive a promotion, we may struggle with imposter syndrome and wrestle with a fear of failure.
Despite these perfectly natural feelings, I think it is good to embrace change. Since change is unavoidable, it is much better to accept reality than to become consumed by negative thinking. When we remain positive, we may find that a change actually benefits us in the long run. Adapting to change also helps us develop resilience, a quality that can help us face an obstacle and see an opportunity in it.
As highlighted above, sooner or later, we will all face change. While change is unsettling, it is vital to keep focused on the positive aspects of our circumstances. Doing so can help us unlock new opportunities we didn’t know were available to us.
Examiner’s Comment
This essay is a high-level response that covers all aspects of the question. In the second paragraph, reasons are presented on why people in society as a whole and individuals might resist change. Then, the third paragraph gives clear reasons to suggest that, overall, this is a positive process. The position is consistent and the conclusion ties both areas together for a strong finish.
Ideas are logically organised. Cohesive devices [Ironically | Despite these | As highlighted above | Doing so can] are used highly effectively and paragraphing is helpful.
Vocabulary is natural and sophisticated [embrace change | deep sense of loss | consumed by negative thinking | develop resilience]. Sentence structure demonstrates full flexibility, with a wide range of complex examples within a range of largely error-free multi-clause sentences.
Little needs to be added to improve the rating other than possibly an example to illustrate why changes should be seen as positive, in the third paragraph. However, this is a very good high-level response.
