Task
You recently organised an all-day meeting for your company, which took place in a local hotel. In their feedback, participants at the meeting said that they liked the hotel, but they were unhappy about the food that was served for lunch.
Write a letter to the manager of the hotel. In your letter
- say what the participants liked about the hotel
- explain why they were unhappy about the food
- suggest what the manager should do to improve the food in future
Candidate’s Answer
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 7.0 score.
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing in connection with a meeting which was organised in your hotel on the 1st November for the employees of the ‘Avanta’ company. According to the feedback given by the guests they thoughroughly enjoyed hotel facilities, particularly the outstanding design of the building and furnishing, as well as the quality of reseption and transfer provided.
However, in spite of the overall contentment with hotel amenities the participants of the meeting reported being dissatisfied with the quality of food served for lunch. All colleagues agreed on the fact that the food was stale, especially bread and some of the salads, and the meat was tough and undercooked. One of the guests complained about having abdominal discomfort after the lunch, though not leading to any serious problems.
Taking into consideration the abovesaid, we would appreciate it if you establish a better control over the kitchen and the cooking process. Considering all favourable reports that were heard about the hotel so far we are not going to leave any negative feedback officially. We hope that this was simply a misfortunate accident and the fame of your hotel will not suffer from it.
Faithfully yours,
Examiner’s Comment
This letter establishes the background to the meeting, thus creating a context for what is to follow. The purpose is clear, the tone is both consistent and appropriate(formal), and each of the bullet points is highlighted and developed. Organisation is logical and there is a clear progression throughout the response. There is also an appropriate range of cohesive devices [According To | However | Taking Into Consideration | Considering]. There is a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility; there is good use of less common items and evidence of collocation [facilities | hotel amenities | dissatisfied with | stale | tough and undercooked | abdominal discomfort | favourable reports | negative feedback]. There are only occasional spelling errors. The writer uses a variety of complex structures and does so accurately, showing good control over both grammar and punctuation.
