Task
Some people think it would be a good idea for schools to teach every young person how to be a good parent.
Do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Describe the skills a person needs to be a good parent.
Candidate’s Answer
This is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 7.0 score.
Every young person, male or female should know more about being a good parent before having children. There are many cases in which very young women give birth to little babies, without having a clue what means to be a parent.
In addition, school should provide courses, teaching young persons to be good parents. It might seem as something very easy. Every woman can be a mother, the problem is what kind of mother she is.
It is said that human instinct develops after giving birth to a child and every mother- father instinctually feels what to do for the baby. But, there are some things that ought to be known before.
A child is not a simple toy. A child is a big responsibility, love and care. A mother should know if she is ready or not to have a child, and a couple should prepare before having children.
We can see many cases with families behaving badly- in real life, on TV, reading newspapers, when children are very bad, when parents abuse their only children, screaming and shouting, smacking them. Who is guilty then? The parent or the child? These cases can end really badly if the persons in charge- here- parents and not the children- don’t learn how to behave themselves, how to handle their children, how and when to give them support.
In addition to all the things written above, it would be a very good idea for- here- parents and not the children- don’t learn how to behave themselves, people how to handle their own problems and above all their children’s problems.
A child is the mirror of the parents.
Examiner’s Comment
This answer has a clear focus and presents a very definite point of view about the general topic area. However, the second question is not directly addressed and no identifiable parenting skills are described. This means the task is only partially answered and this limits the Band score.
The argument is quite easy to follow and a range of devices is used to connect the ideas. However, some of these connectives are not appropriate and paragraphing is not always logical, especially at the beginning of the answer. The closing statement in the conclusion is relevant to the argument but it is not well integrated into the writing.
A range of vocabulary is used with flexibility and a good level of control. There are examples of appropriate idiomatic expressions that suggest that the writer has a good active resource. There are some lapses and some minor spelling mistakes, but these do not reduce communication.
The writer uses a range of structures effectively and accurately, with examples of sophisticated phrasing. However, there are quite a lot of short, simple sentences too, and there are lapses and omissions in some structures, although these do not prevent the reader from understanding the message.
