Task
Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example, working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children).
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Candidate’s Answer
This is written by a candidate who achieved a Band 8.0 score.
It has been suggested that high school students should be involved in unpaid community services as a compulsory part of high school programmes. Most of the colleges are already providing opportunities to gain work experience, however these are not compulsory. In my opinion, sending students to work in community services is a good idea as it can provide them with many lots of valuable skills.
Life skills are very important and by doing voluntary work, students can learn how to communicate with others and work in a team but also how to manage their time and improve their organisational skills. Nowadays, unfortunately, teenagers do not have many mostly go home and sit in front of the TV, browse internet or play video games.
By giving them compulsory work activities with charitable or community organisations, they will be encouraged to do something more creative. Skills gained through compulsory work will not only be an asset on their CV but also increase their employability. Students will also gain more respect towards work and money as they will realise that it is not that easy to earn them and hopefully will learn to spend them in a more practical way.
Healthy life balance and exercise are strongly promoted by the NHS, and therefore any kind of spare time charity work will prevent from sitting and doing nothing. It could also possibly reduce the crime level in the high school age group. If students have activities to do, they will not be bored and come up with silly ideas which can be dangerous for them or their surroundings.
In conclusion, I think this is a very good idea, and I hope this programme will be put into action for high schools/colleges shortly.
Examiner’s Comment
The answer addresses all parts of the prompt sufficiently, focusing on the benefits for students rather than society. A number of relevant, extended, and supported ideas are used to produce a well-developed response to the question. However, some ideas, for example, the reference to the crime level, are not fully extended. The ideas are logically ordered and cohesion is consistently well managed. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and progression between paragraphs is managed with some sophistication. A wide range of vocabulary is used to articulate meanings precisely, with skilful use of uncommon lexis, and very few inappropriacies. The range of grammatical structures used is also wide, with only occasional minor errors.
